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Author Topic: I'm meeting with my Branch President on Sunday afternoon (update)  (Read 1021 times)

N3uroTypical

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Re: I'm meeting with my Branch President on Sunday afternoon
« Reply #15 on: April 19, 2017, 10:55:30 am »
Follow up after the meeting, in writing, confirming what you said and what he said and committed to.  Make sure your SP gets a copy of it.   If they are assigning him to go into anyone's home, then send a copy to the Area Presidency and the First Presidency too.   That way they'll do it, having been fully informed.
I totally get the desire to do this, but not sure it would be all that helpful.

Documenting who said what when, and making sure everyone knows it, just isn't that effective at getting people to do what you want.  For one thing, it bugs the crap out of them.  Might as well show up with a video camera or even a news crew.  For another, it clearly communicates a suspicion, a lack of trust.  If I had raised my hand to sustain this guy, I don't see how I could do what pnr is suggesting here.  That looks like the opposite of sustaining to me.

That's why I prefer just putting everything you have to say into a letter, including a copy from the website proving he's a sex offender, and then sending it to BP and SP.  Between the two of them, they'll take action.  What that action is, is probably none of your business.
« Last Edit: April 20, 2017, 10:27:13 am by N3uroTypical »
"Somebody should have set a match to this place long ago."
 
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dyany

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Re: I'm meeting with my Branch President on Sunday afternoon
« Reply #16 on: April 19, 2017, 12:05:08 pm »
Palmon: in the beginning, yes.  But 'otherwise good people' often NEED to be informed, and while not engaging in gossip, hearing tidbits needs to prompt them to find out the truth.  If it is true, to take appropriate protective action.  If false, to stand up for the falsely accused.  I don't accept 'not engaging in gossip' as an excuse for ignorance.  You don't have to spread it to find out the truth and take appropriate action. 
 

palmetto_gal

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Re: I'm meeting with my Branch President on Sunday afternoon
« Reply #17 on: April 19, 2017, 12:39:18 pm »
PG - I was there on Sunday 26th March. Sadly, you were not there.
I am so sorry I missed you.  Please let me know when you plan to visit again.  I have many problems with my Rheumatoid Arthritis.  Moving about in the morning is one of them.  My work schedule is now 2-10:30 pm to accommodate this issue, but Sacrament Meeting can't be rescheduled.  I hope to see you when you come over this way again. 
 

pnr

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Re: I'm meeting with my Branch President on Sunday afternoon
« Reply #18 on: April 19, 2017, 08:38:41 pm »
Quote
I totally get the desire to do this, but not sure it would be all that helpful.

It is absolutely helpful in making sure that all the parties making and supporting a decision are making a fully informed one, though.
« Last Edit: April 20, 2017, 01:49:28 am by dyany »
Nauvoo 1270, Feb 2005
 

palmetto_gal

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Re: I'm meeting with my Branch President on Sunday afternoon
« Reply #19 on: April 20, 2017, 12:25:08 am »
Quote
Between the two of them, they'll take action.  What that action is, is probably of your business.

NT:  is the word "none" missing from the second sentence?
 
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AndrewR

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Re: I'm meeting with my Branch President on Sunday afternoon
« Reply #20 on: April 20, 2017, 03:52:17 am »
PG - I tend not to say I am coming in case my plans have to change. Right up until about 4pm on the Saturday I wasn't sure if I would have to work the Sunday.
Don't ask me, I only live here.
Nauvoodle since March 2005 #1412
 

N3uroTypical

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Re: I'm meeting with my Branch President on Sunday afternoon
« Reply #21 on: April 20, 2017, 10:27:38 am »
Quote
Between the two of them, they'll take action.  What that action is, is probably of your business.

NT:  is the word "none" missing from the second sentence?
Yep - all fixed!
"Somebody should have set a match to this place long ago."
 

palmetto_gal

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Re: I'm meeting with my Branch President on Sunday afternoon
« Reply #22 on: April 23, 2017, 03:05:28 pm »
I met with my Branch President today.  He walked in, I was already seated.  He suggested we begin with a prayer, and he offered the prayer.  I remarked that today's Sacrament Meeting was very inspiring and uplifting, and he agreed.  Then I said, "I don't know exactly how to put this, but I've heard that Bro. & Sis. XXX are being assigned to the Branch for two years as proselyting/service missionaries."  He replied that he did not know that, but he had only had two weeks' notice when another couple from our Stake had been assigned to us.

I then told him, "If they are indeed coming, then you probably need to know that he is on the SC Sex Offender Registry." and I handed him the printout.  He replied that he hadn't seen their membership records because they haven't been sent to our Branch yet, but he would look for an annotation and would also speak with the Stake President.  He mentioned that he had served as a Bishop in Alaska and was familiar with this kind of situation.  He thanked me for coming to him with the information.  I told him I hated that our first official meeting was on a negative topic and I didn't want him to think I was trying to act as a vigilante.  He assured me I had done the right thing, and that it could in no way be described as gossip.  We ended the meeting by discussing how to make sure everyone in Branch Council is supposed to ensure that various meetings and programs are entered into the lds dot org calendar so that I can use it when preparing the weekly bulletin. 

I must say that ever since I decided to meet with my Br. Pres., I've felt a sense of peace about the issue, and the meeting itself gave me personal confirmation that bringing this issue to light was needful.  He did state that the wife of the couple should have shown more restraint about publishing the info about their mission.  As he said, "But that's social media for you."

If they do show up in our Branch, I'll post about it, but somehow, I don't think they will be assigned here.
 
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N3uroTypical

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Re: I'm meeting with my Branch President on Sunday afternoon
« Reply #23 on: April 23, 2017, 08:02:35 pm »
Good job, PalmettoGal.   :)
"Somebody should have set a match to this place long ago."
 
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palmetto_gal

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Re: I'm meeting with my Branch President on Sunday afternoon (update)
« Reply #24 on: May 09, 2017, 01:52:27 am »
I was not at church on Sunday, but I did get a phone call after 1 pm from a number I didn't recognize.  It was the wife of this Missionary Couple, calling to say she had missed seeing me, hoped I was well, etc., etc., yada, yada.  (Did I mention she was my RSP at a different unit many years ago, when she was married to someone else?  So we go back at least a decade and a half.)

This told me that they were indeed serving in our unit, so I must assume that all is well with the brother's membership record, etc.  Please correct me if I'm wrong, but isn't sexual abuse of a minor automatic grounds for excommunication, especially if the perpetrator pled guilty?  Therefore I must assume (again) that he has been duly rebaptized, and his record expunged, which only happens with the approval of the First Presidency. 

I personally don't care for each of these two people, so I don't plan to have much interaction with either of them if it can be avoided.  I won't be rude, but I'm not going out of my way to spend time with either of them, which is difficult in a small Branch.  The wife is a major hugger/kisser, so I'm sure I'm in for a bear hug next time I see her. 

I texted with my VT, who is also my current RSP.  She said it was awkward for her on Sunday, since she is cognizant of the entire situation.  She and I agreed to pray about the situation and make the best of it.  As I said, I just don't want to get involved in a one on one situation with either of them. 

There is still the issue (in my mind) as to whether or not the Branch Pres.  should inform the Primary Presidency.  That is totally his call, and I'm going to steer clear of that situation.  Honestly, I'm of two minds about this.  I recognize the power of the Atonement of Christ, and I don't want to see this man ostracized for his past.  (We all have done enough things we'd rather not have brought to light that are a part of our past.) But I also think about how I would feel if I were the Primary Pres. and I found out through another channel about this man's record.  As I said, this has me in a quandary. 

Any suggestions/encouragement from fellow Nauvoodles are more than welcome. 
 

Palmon

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Re: I'm meeting with my Branch President on Sunday afternoon (update)
« Reply #25 on: May 09, 2017, 03:34:49 am »
He's on the registered sex offender list and his offense was with a minor - doesn't that legally preclude him from contact with minors? Yes, the atonement covers him but that doesn't mean he is to be left alone with children. If the Branch President has done nothing, perhaps it is time to let the Stake President know.  Maybe look up the laws and regulations about the list and take that with you.
As for his wife, have a frank discussion with her about what you know and I bet she and her husband will avoid you. Include, of course, that you do not wish to be hugged or kissed.
 

AndrewR

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Re: I'm meeting with my Branch President on Sunday afternoon (update)
« Reply #26 on: May 09, 2017, 09:15:33 am »
If he was convicted of sexual contact with a minor he will almost certainly have been excommunicated.

As you say, First Presidency approval would have been required for him to be re-baptised. He would then have had a year before he could apply to have his blessing restored. The First Presidency then decide if that can happen then, or later.

Even following blessings restoration there would be an annotation on his record - to stop him working with minors in the Church.

Lifting of this annotation is another application to the First Presidency. If he is still on the sex offenders register I doubt such a request would have been granted.

Forgiveness is not the same as trust. We do not put people in a position of temptation to see if they will sin!
Don't ask me, I only live here.
Nauvoodle since March 2005 #1412
 
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pnr

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Re: I'm meeting with my Branch President on Sunday afternoon (update)
« Reply #27 on: May 09, 2017, 01:37:24 pm »
My guess is that the investigation and review is still in process.   And while excommunication would absolutely happen most times in this time, that might not have been the case 20 or more years ago. 

To OP, I don't think it is your job to tell the PP.   But in your place, I would not avoid the the man, because I would want to be in a position to have eyes on him if he was close to children.
Nauvoo 1270, Feb 2005
 

 

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