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Messages - Patty Rain

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1
No guarantee that mother would have lived with the chemo, especially long enough to raise the children.  Seems to me that if she died in six months of learning about it, the chemo would only be a temporary delay.  We really don't know enough to be able to assess this for her.

And we don't know what quality of life she would have.  She may not have been able to give anything to get children and been more of a burden to her husband having to cate for her on top of the kids.

That's why I will never judge what should be done in these situations. There are too many unknowns both ways and I have no ability to get inspiration for them so I will be supportive of whatever way they choose.

2
Nauvoo International / Re: A Missionary By Himself...
« on: September 14, 2017, 08:21:24 pm »
Huh. I didn't know that.  I have 2 nephews who have had different missions in their own. One lived at home and worked on computer stuff in down town salt lake. Another lived in an apartment with roommates I think and worked at Deseret Industries. I thought it was just something all over, but the Phoenix/Mesa area does do a lot pilot programs.

3
Nauvoo International / Re: A Missionary By Himself...
« on: September 13, 2017, 01:53:32 am »
We have a missionary here who covers all of AZ, lives at home and does service for refugee organizations etc. The day I met him he kept coming down the stairs and I wondeted where his companion was and why he stayed upatairs. Found out he doesn't have a companion. His mom came to pick him up later. It was great to see how a mission could be made to fit him. 

4
Writers' Showcase / Re: New book
« on: September 09, 2017, 02:37:55 am »
Rex was wanting a book tonight. I asked if he wanted books 4 and 5.

"There's more?! Yes, please!"

Click. Books 4 and 5 are bought.

I'm sorry that he hasn't writen reviews,  but he did rate them all 5s (under my name).

I should tell you that he is picky with what he likes to read.  He will read the same books over and over again rather than read new books he only kind of likes.

5
Mormon Life / Re: Duties - Stewardship - of a Visiting Teaching Supervisor
« on: September 05, 2017, 11:51:43 pm »
A lot will depend on the RSP. When I was the coordinator I only needed to know if the RSP needed to know any needs (I could pass the needs on or just let the RSP know she needed to talk with the VTs. Otherwise, I just asked and reported if contact was a letter, call or visit because that is what the computer let me check off. I don't know if the computer has changed or not.

Because I heard back reports my RSP had me sit with her and help her ogranite routes. I know not all RSPs do that.

So basically you do what the handbook says above and you work with the RSP and the Lord as to how you do it.

6
News of the Church / Re: New curriculum
« on: September 02, 2017, 12:40:07 pm »
Thanks libertygranny for posting those.  It will be interesting to see how teachers deal with this.  What I saw in it was an expectation for members to do more study at home and more thinking in class.  No longer a process of spoon feeding the whole lesson to the students as many teachers have done.

I think it will still be tough for some teachers.  Some have experienced the reading the whole lesson all their lives and don't have good examples.  Some teachers think the lesson is all about "me" so they have to come up with good content and entertain those in class.  Some of them will really fight expecting more of the students and many students will take a while to develop trust that when they come to class learning responsibility is on them. 

I am seeing the new curriculim as a good thing, but leaders will have to work hard with some teachers to get past what they have done in the past.   Hopefully they will see this change as a starting point and not just continue what they have always done.

That is one thing I have found good about the YM and YW getting the Come Follow Me first.  I know that the repetition got old, but for those YMYW who were allowed to teach as they were supposed to do they will be gaining these skills and becoming the new teachers in RS and priesthood.  I have seen this happening with my youngest the last 2 years  since my husband became his leader and does have the boys teach - there are only a few of them so they rotate between leaders and boys.  It has been more of a struggle with the my daughter because her YW leaders haven't wanted to give up giving the lessons, but fortunately through seminary and institute she has been learning by example how to teach through her teachers.     

7
News of the Church / Re: New curriculum
« on: September 02, 2017, 12:20:24 pm »
Ok, so the way I see what I looked is that it's a topic and I as a teacher can build the lesson as I'm inspired. If that is the case, then I think this is good.

Is that not the way all lessons are taught, all the time? *confused* That's certainly the norm in my ward (in SS, RS/PH, YW, Primary, Nursery...)

I have found that many teachers have not read, not known was there or ignored this instruction in the front of the manuals:

Quote
Seek the guidance of the Holy Ghost as you prepare to teach. Study the chapter to become confident in your understanding of President Hinckley’s teachings, and prayerfully select the teachings that you feel will be most helpful....

As you teach from this book, invite others to share their thoughts, ask questions, testify, and teach one another. When they actively participate, they will be more prepared to learn and to receive personal revelation.

Allow good discussions to continue rather than trying to cover all the teachings. ...

 Read together some of President Hinckley’s teachings in the chapter. Ask participants to share examples from the scriptures and from their own experiences that relate to those teachings.

By that I mean that rather than "select the teachings" and "allow good discussions" many teachers try to cover it all or most of it.  Yes, we were asked to actually use quotes from the lesson in our lesson, but that never meant we couldn't pull in scriptures, our own stories, discussion or different learning methods. 

It's been kind of funny because there have been some complaints about assigning conference talks for sacrament meeting talks.  Some people read through almost all of those talks for their own talk.  Some people are even kind of ornery about being assigned to give them.  Their thinking is that if they have been assigned that talk that they must only give what is in that talk just as those teaching the prophet lessons think they have to stick with reading quote after quote. 

This is part of the reason we have the teacher's councils - to learn the skills to teach in the way the introduction describes.  I would love to have more of this in the teacher's councils, but having studied about if for several years it may be more helpful to add just a few skills each year. 

8
News of the Church / Re: New curriculum
« on: August 29, 2017, 01:42:27 am »
Taalcon, there was a pilot program being done by stakes that went from Jan to June that involved all organizations in a new curriculum. There will be 5 new manuals when it rolls out: 1 for individuals & families for study at home, 1 for SS, 1 for Primary, 1 for Aaronic and Melc. phd, and 1 for YW & RS. They all correlate with one another.

From what i have gathered from some who did the pilot, it may roll out in 2019 or 2020, depending on how fast they can get all the materials translated into all the languages needed.

So the men and women are separate for SS AND  the third hour?

9
Forum and Member News / Re: I can use your prayers.
« on: August 03, 2017, 02:56:57 am »
Hugs Susan.

10
General Discussion / Re: Cabin & Porch
« on: July 31, 2017, 10:22:18 am »
Iggy - something that might help you with the insulin co-pays: check into prices of both Novolog and Humalog. They are interchangeable for me and sometimes my insurance covers one and then they will switch. It's possible one is lower than the other. I know some people need to go up or down a unit when changing, but there is no change at all for me.

Also look into switching Lantus for Basaglar. Basaglar is fairly new and I've found not everyone knows about it.  Some consider it as almost a generic for Lantus and for me it is MUCH cheaper. The only thing I don't like about it, sounds like it wouldn't be a problem for you - it only comes in pens, no vials and syringes.

11
General Discussion / Re: Vacation
« on: July 27, 2017, 11:58:19 pm »
Between Rex's frequent flier miles for work, bonus miles on credit cards and a good deal on plane tickets we went to Spain.

We flew into Madrid and walked and walked there.  Was led on a tour by a tour guide who forgot we were meeting him, but luckily 30 minutes later he was meeting a couple in the same place.  He proceeded to get drunk as we went from place to place.  But he did have some good info along the way.  We walked and walked in Madrid and saw a number of good places. 

One of our side trips was the Enchanted city near Cuenca that has a lot of large rock formations that are really cool. https://www.google.com/search?q=enchanted+city+spain&safe=strict&source=lnms&tbm=isch&sa=X&ved=0ahUKEwjjy4Wph6vVAhXpgFQKHf6JCLEQ_AUICigB&biw=1142&bih=718

We rented a car and left Madrid and made a circle around the South West part of Spain, but so nowhere near all of it.  One of my favorite things to see was the Mezquita.  It was an old Muslim church that was later turned into a Christian one.  I had seen pictures of it before going and wasn't real excited and really debated going, but everyone kept saying to do it so I did and am very glad.  The pictures really don't let you see it very well at all. 

We really enjoyed being together, but were grateful to be back home.  And it wasn't long before we were on the road again.

This time my parents were having their 50th wedding anniversary and everyone was coming from across the country. Because everyone was coming we combined my son's wedding with it instead of having it here in December.  While we were always 1 or 2 short the entire time we were there we didn't manage to see everyone.

We made a stop in the middle of Utah on the way home and saw my father-in-law who is in an assisted living center there. That was a good visit. 

Because of Rex's days off work I was very concerned about how much time we should take, especially after the Spain trip. We ended up miscommunicating which day he would go back to work. Meanwhile my parents and 2 of my brother's families went to Bryce National Park.  After we left lunch with my FIL I realized we were on the same road as my family would be and texted my brother to see where he was.  He told me and we "dropped by".  Well, my parents had reserved more rooms and were too late in cancelling the one for either us or my sister when we said we wouldn't make it so there was a room for us still and since now we had one more day than I had planned we stayed and went to Bryce and dinner with them. 

It was a good trip.  I don't know when it will happened again.  The last time we were all together was 16 years ago.  Funny thing was we got a family picture the night before my brother was getting married so my SIL is in it even though she wasn't legally family yet.  For this trip we got a family picture the morning of the wedding so the same thing happened with my DIL.

12
Mormon Life / Re: PRAYER LIST
« on: July 22, 2017, 11:09:10 am »
CurleBay - hate that waiting. It was hard enough to wait and see what was happening to Rex's job on occasion. Your waiting would be even more difficult. Hope it turns out well.

Jana - glad you were able to talk with him. Hope things work out for you too. Even though I was in a little contact with the family Brady was staying with when he was not communicating with me it was so rough.

13
Mormon Life / Re: Struggles with Church Leadership structure
« on: July 18, 2017, 07:39:26 am »
Dany - I think one of the biggest issues is determining who are those evil leaders. You say that most will take the side of the leaders and that may be true, but I really don't think most would take the side of "evil" leaders. In most cases I think what the person hurt feels is an evil leader is very different than what others who know or have watched the situation unfold think  is evil.

My sister is very upset with, what you might cal, my, evil, parents. There is a situation that we know about and because only one member of the family called to "get her side" my sister feels the rest of us have sided with my parents. Truthfully, when I heard what happened I did not automatically assume which side was right and personally I don't  think it is any of my business nor do I feel I should take sides. I do feel my parents could have jumped to conclusions quickly, but I feel like my sister has some major struggles which affect her feelings on all this. My sister has no idea about my feelings on all of this in part because anything apart from siding with her makes her feel I am unsupportive. So I am stuck till she is willing to communicate with me or rather my parents on this.

So often people just seem to want others to take sides against what the consider evil leaders and then call it a lack of support when that doesn't happen.

So I think you need to determine 2 things. 1. Is the leader actually evil in the eyes of both. 2. What does the person consider "support"? If we don't consider the person or situation evil (either because of disagreement or lack of information) and the person wants us to "support" by taking sides it is never going to work. And that is why some people can only "love them" and to expect something more would be unfair.


So there are different answers. What do we do if we disagree that the person is evil and the person wants us to take sides? What do we do if we don't have enough info and we are expected to take sides? What if we feel the person is evil and our friend wants us to take sides? What if we disagree, but the friend truly just wants support? And so on.

So I have to ask, which situation do you want us to speak to? Should we just consider those who both agree are evil situations and where the person just wants support or are we talking about those who disagree and the friend wants us to take sides? Or something in between?

14
Mormon Life / Re: Struggles with Church Leadership structure
« on: July 16, 2017, 08:36:37 am »
I always struggle about this topic. I become very defensive because while in leadership positions I was accused of things that never happened. I only found out because someone else told me, never the one doing the accusing.

I've now been married 25 years. In that time I have learned that my husband would never purposely hurt me, but because we think so differently sometimes he sees situations totally different than I do.

I've finally learned how important it is to talk things over with the accused. Time and time again when I talk with my online friends and in real life friends I find that people extremely rarely do. I encourage many of these people to go back to their leaders and talk about what happened to make sure good communication was going on and they don't. One friend, after I have suggested reasons why something may have happened agreed with me, yet instead of going to talk with her leaders later cotinued to accuse them of wrong doing.

The more I talk with people, the more I believe that 99% of the time there is a communication problem and 90% of the time it is pretty much only a communication.

So for the other 10% of the time when something more needs to be changed I first take issue wit the idea that we are taught when there is a problem we should "ONLY" go to local leadership. I'd like to see where that is an official teaching. We are definitely counseled to go to local leaders first - if that were to happen then often many of these things should be cleared up. Most people, when they get more of the story of how someone has been hurt etc try to change their ways.

In my calling I work closely with the stake president's councilor. There are things he does that sometimes drive me crazy and sometimes really hinder my calling, yet when I talk with him I find he is clueless about the problems. Now when I start having problems I will just tell him, "look, here is a problem and why it is a problem.We need to solve this.Here are my suggestions."

So personally the first thing I think people can DO is listen, asking the Lord to help us look on the other person's heart. Most people don't listen first. They just try to solve before understanding the person's Spirit and heart.

Then after doing that you need to find out what they have done to resolve the problem. Like I was talking about above, most times I would have them go back to the leader first to see if it can't be resolved. The other times I would have them go to the proper authority - either civil or church person above that person.

15
Forum and Member News / Re: Little Baby Emily!
« on: July 13, 2017, 02:30:29 pm »
Cogratulations!

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