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Messages - Patty Rain

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Writers' Showcase / Re: A parody of bad writing
« on: December 15, 2017, 06:29:02 pm »
Thank you! I have been having fun reading it.  Told my book club about them today.
The following users thanked this post: dyany

Technical Talk / Re: Phone and computer differences
« on: October 27, 2017, 06:42:48 pm »
Ahh. Ok. Figured it out lol.  Redd posted it on different boards!   :D
The following users thanked this post: LMAshton

Writers' Showcase / Re: New book
« on: October 27, 2017, 06:30:02 pm »
Rex leaves to come home tomorrow! I wonder if he had time to download it before he leaves for his flight!
The following users thanked this post: Palmon

Technical Talk / Re: Password help please
« on: October 16, 2017, 12:49:18 pm »
Thank you! 
The following users thanked this post: dyany

Forum and Member News / Re: Life Changes too
« on: October 09, 2017, 04:12:05 pm »
I'm glad you have the opportunity.  :)  I hope it doesn't mean we see less of you, but would understand.
The following users thanked this post: Scruffydog

General Discussion / Perspective changes
« on: October 09, 2017, 01:08:42 pm »
I always hate when people say things like,  "just be grateful you have food. The people in India don't."  It isn't really listening to the person and empathizing with them and it rarely works. Sometimes things, even little things, are hard and it is ok to acknowledge that.

My husband is in France for work.  We got a text from his coworker saying there was an emergency and then texts saying not to worry, but no idea what the problem was. Then I emailed another coworker and same thing. Then I found out he was in the hospital and still didn't know what the problem was. 

Now, I wasn't terribly worried,  but I did want to know what was going on.  I posted on Facebook about what was happening.

A little while later I found out he had kidney stones and was feeling much better.

Then one of my friends posted to my posted that it must have been scary and she was glad everything was ok.

And my whole perspective changed like that...

See, just one year ago she got one of those emergency contacts and her husband wasn't ok. He died. I'm guessing my post brought up memories for her, but she said nothing about her situation. She just was caring enough to listen to me about our situation.

I hope to be like her some day.
The following users thanked this post: LMAshton, beefche, dyany

No guarantee that mother would have lived with the chemo, especially long enough to raise the children.  Seems to me that if she died in six months of learning about it, the chemo would only be a temporary delay.  We really don't know enough to be able to assess this for her.

And we don't know what quality of life she would have.  She may not have been able to give anything to get children and been more of a burden to her husband having to cate for her on top of the kids.

That's why I will never judge what should be done in these situations. There are too many unknowns both ways and I have no ability to get inspiration for them so I will be supportive of whatever way they choose.
The following users thanked this post: Jen, beefche, dyany

Writers' Showcase / Re: New book
« on: September 09, 2017, 02:37:55 am »
Rex was wanting a book tonight. I asked if he wanted books 4 and 5.

"There's more?! Yes, please!"

Click. Books 4 and 5 are bought.

I'm sorry that he hasn't writen reviews,  but he did rate them all 5s (under my name).

I should tell you that he is picky with what he likes to read.  He will read the same books over and over again rather than read new books he only kind of likes.
The following users thanked this post: Palmon

Mormon Life / Re: Duties - Stewardship - of a Visiting Teaching Supervisor
« on: September 05, 2017, 11:51:43 pm »
A lot will depend on the RSP. When I was the coordinator I only needed to know if the RSP needed to know any needs (I could pass the needs on or just let the RSP know she needed to talk with the VTs. Otherwise, I just asked and reported if contact was a letter, call or visit because that is what the computer let me check off. I don't know if the computer has changed or not.

Because I heard back reports my RSP had me sit with her and help her ogranite routes. I know not all RSPs do that.

So basically you do what the handbook says above and you work with the RSP and the Lord as to how you do it.
The following users thanked this post: Iggy, Susan

News of the Church / Re: New curriculum
« on: September 02, 2017, 12:20:24 pm »
Ok, so the way I see what I looked is that it's a topic and I as a teacher can build the lesson as I'm inspired. If that is the case, then I think this is good.

Is that not the way all lessons are taught, all the time? *confused* That's certainly the norm in my ward (in SS, RS/PH, YW, Primary, Nursery...)

I have found that many teachers have not read, not known was there or ignored this instruction in the front of the manuals:

Seek the guidance of the Holy Ghost as you prepare to teach. Study the chapter to become confident in your understanding of President Hinckley’s teachings, and prayerfully select the teachings that you feel will be most helpful....

As you teach from this book, invite others to share their thoughts, ask questions, testify, and teach one another. When they actively participate, they will be more prepared to learn and to receive personal revelation.

Allow good discussions to continue rather than trying to cover all the teachings. ...

 Read together some of President Hinckley’s teachings in the chapter. Ask participants to share examples from the scriptures and from their own experiences that relate to those teachings.

By that I mean that rather than "select the teachings" and "allow good discussions" many teachers try to cover it all or most of it.  Yes, we were asked to actually use quotes from the lesson in our lesson, but that never meant we couldn't pull in scriptures, our own stories, discussion or different learning methods. 

It's been kind of funny because there have been some complaints about assigning conference talks for sacrament meeting talks.  Some people read through almost all of those talks for their own talk.  Some people are even kind of ornery about being assigned to give them.  Their thinking is that if they have been assigned that talk that they must only give what is in that talk just as those teaching the prophet lessons think they have to stick with reading quote after quote. 

This is part of the reason we have the teacher's councils - to learn the skills to teach in the way the introduction describes.  I would love to have more of this in the teacher's councils, but having studied about if for several years it may be more helpful to add just a few skills each year. 
The following users thanked this post: ketchupqueen

Forum and Member News / Re: I can use your prayers.
« on: August 03, 2017, 02:56:57 am »
Hugs Susan.
The following users thanked this post: Susan

General Discussion / Re: Cabin & Porch
« on: July 31, 2017, 10:22:18 am »
Iggy - something that might help you with the insulin co-pays: check into prices of both Novolog and Humalog. They are interchangeable for me and sometimes my insurance covers one and then they will switch. It's possible one is lower than the other. I know some people need to go up or down a unit when changing, but there is no change at all for me.

Also look into switching Lantus for Basaglar. Basaglar is fairly new and I've found not everyone knows about it.  Some consider it as almost a generic for Lantus and for me it is MUCH cheaper. The only thing I don't like about it, sounds like it wouldn't be a problem for you - it only comes in pens, no vials and syringes.
The following users thanked this post: Iggy

General Discussion / Re: Vacation
« on: July 27, 2017, 11:58:19 pm »
Between Rex's frequent flier miles for work, bonus miles on credit cards and a good deal on plane tickets we went to Spain.

We flew into Madrid and walked and walked there.  Was led on a tour by a tour guide who forgot we were meeting him, but luckily 30 minutes later he was meeting a couple in the same place.  He proceeded to get drunk as we went from place to place.  But he did have some good info along the way.  We walked and walked in Madrid and saw a number of good places. 

One of our side trips was the Enchanted city near Cuenca that has a lot of large rock formations that are really cool. https://www.google.com/search?q=enchanted+city+spain&safe=strict&source=lnms&tbm=isch&sa=X&ved=0ahUKEwjjy4Wph6vVAhXpgFQKHf6JCLEQ_AUICigB&biw=1142&bih=718

We rented a car and left Madrid and made a circle around the South West part of Spain, but so nowhere near all of it.  One of my favorite things to see was the Mezquita.  It was an old Muslim church that was later turned into a Christian one.  I had seen pictures of it before going and wasn't real excited and really debated going, but everyone kept saying to do it so I did and am very glad.  The pictures really don't let you see it very well at all. 

We really enjoyed being together, but were grateful to be back home.  And it wasn't long before we were on the road again.

This time my parents were having their 50th wedding anniversary and everyone was coming from across the country. Because everyone was coming we combined my son's wedding with it instead of having it here in December.  While we were always 1 or 2 short the entire time we were there we didn't manage to see everyone.

We made a stop in the middle of Utah on the way home and saw my father-in-law who is in an assisted living center there. That was a good visit. 

Because of Rex's days off work I was very concerned about how much time we should take, especially after the Spain trip. We ended up miscommunicating which day he would go back to work. Meanwhile my parents and 2 of my brother's families went to Bryce National Park.  After we left lunch with my FIL I realized we were on the same road as my family would be and texted my brother to see where he was.  He told me and we "dropped by".  Well, my parents had reserved more rooms and were too late in cancelling the one for either us or my sister when we said we wouldn't make it so there was a room for us still and since now we had one more day than I had planned we stayed and went to Bryce and dinner with them. 

It was a good trip.  I don't know when it will happened again.  The last time we were all together was 16 years ago.  Funny thing was we got a family picture the night before my brother was getting married so my SIL is in it even though she wasn't legally family yet.  For this trip we got a family picture the morning of the wedding so the same thing happened with my DIL.
The following users thanked this post: curlybat

Mormon Life / Re: Struggles with Church Leadership structure
« on: July 18, 2017, 07:39:26 am »
Dany - I think one of the biggest issues is determining who are those evil leaders. You say that most will take the side of the leaders and that may be true, but I really don't think most would take the side of "evil" leaders. In most cases I think what the person hurt feels is an evil leader is very different than what others who know or have watched the situation unfold think  is evil.

My sister is very upset with, what you might cal, my, evil, parents. There is a situation that we know about and because only one member of the family called to "get her side" my sister feels the rest of us have sided with my parents. Truthfully, when I heard what happened I did not automatically assume which side was right and personally I don't  think it is any of my business nor do I feel I should take sides. I do feel my parents could have jumped to conclusions quickly, but I feel like my sister has some major struggles which affect her feelings on all this. My sister has no idea about my feelings on all of this in part because anything apart from siding with her makes her feel I am unsupportive. So I am stuck till she is willing to communicate with me or rather my parents on this.

So often people just seem to want others to take sides against what the consider evil leaders and then call it a lack of support when that doesn't happen.

So I think you need to determine 2 things. 1. Is the leader actually evil in the eyes of both. 2. What does the person consider "support"? If we don't consider the person or situation evil (either because of disagreement or lack of information) and the person wants us to "support" by taking sides it is never going to work. And that is why some people can only "love them" and to expect something more would be unfair.

So there are different answers. What do we do if we disagree that the person is evil and the person wants us to take sides? What do we do if we don't have enough info and we are expected to take sides? What if we feel the person is evil and our friend wants us to take sides? What if we disagree, but the friend truly just wants support? And so on.

So I have to ask, which situation do you want us to speak to? Should we just consider those who both agree are evil situations and where the person just wants support or are we talking about those who disagree and the friend wants us to take sides? Or something in between?
The following users thanked this post: beefche, Roper

Mormon Life / Re: Struggles with Church Leadership structure
« on: July 16, 2017, 08:36:37 am »
I always struggle about this topic. I become very defensive because while in leadership positions I was accused of things that never happened. I only found out because someone else told me, never the one doing the accusing.

I've now been married 25 years. In that time I have learned that my husband would never purposely hurt me, but because we think so differently sometimes he sees situations totally different than I do.

I've finally learned how important it is to talk things over with the accused. Time and time again when I talk with my online friends and in real life friends I find that people extremely rarely do. I encourage many of these people to go back to their leaders and talk about what happened to make sure good communication was going on and they don't. One friend, after I have suggested reasons why something may have happened agreed with me, yet instead of going to talk with her leaders later cotinued to accuse them of wrong doing.

The more I talk with people, the more I believe that 99% of the time there is a communication problem and 90% of the time it is pretty much only a communication.

So for the other 10% of the time when something more needs to be changed I first take issue wit the idea that we are taught when there is a problem we should "ONLY" go to local leadership. I'd like to see where that is an official teaching. We are definitely counseled to go to local leaders first - if that were to happen then often many of these things should be cleared up. Most people, when they get more of the story of how someone has been hurt etc try to change their ways.

In my calling I work closely with the stake president's councilor. There are things he does that sometimes drive me crazy and sometimes really hinder my calling, yet when I talk with him I find he is clueless about the problems. Now when I start having problems I will just tell him, "look, here is a problem and why it is a problem.We need to solve this.Here are my suggestions."

So personally the first thing I think people can DO is listen, asking the Lord to help us look on the other person's heart. Most people don't listen first. They just try to solve before understanding the person's Spirit and heart.

Then after doing that you need to find out what they have done to resolve the problem. Like I was talking about above, most times I would have them go back to the leader first to see if it can't be resolved. The other times I would have them go to the proper authority - either civil or church person above that person.
The following users thanked this post: Roper, Susan, Palmon

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